In The Rearview Mirror

It's been a year since I began writing this weekly blog. A year! And what a year it's been.

Looking back, I certainly have referred to pop music -- in A Peaceful Easy Feeling, Risky Business and, of course, Funk Sway.

I've written about tragedy in We Are Virginia Tech, When Times Are Tough and Changing Through Crisis.

I've spent time talking about workplace issues with The Best Job Interview Question Ever, Getting Back To Work and Extreme Jobs.

I've written about books, like the best-seller called The Secret, in How To Get What You Want, and other great books in Forgiveness and The Power of Discipline.

One of the most popular columns I've produced is Fight or Flight? Or Mend and Tend. Believe it or not, this piece is read nearly every day by someone in the world.

Because I have readers in Singapore and Moldova. Ireland and Italy. South Africa and India. The breadth of geography is astounding. But most of you readers are living somewhere between Alaska and Florida, and I thank you kindly for your time.

Do I have a favorite column? Not really -- they're all my little brainchildren and, like a doting mother, I can't pick one I like best. When I re-read my columns, I remember what was going on at the time, how I felt, how a client felt, what the day was like. So, for me, each column is its own time capsule.

Folks ask me, "Where do you get the ideas you write about?" Sometimes it's a theme which emerges from several coaching clients in one week, or it's something I'm working on getting in my own life. Many of you pass on ideas, and you've saved my bacon more than once -- so keep your suggestions coming!

What have I not written on in the last year that needs attention? Well, let's see... Katharine Briggs and her daughter Isabel Myers, and what they accomplished. How teenagers provide excellent role models. Spam. The link between self-knowledge and beauty. What to do when your boss is a jerk. How to be heard. And, in the words of the pop poet, Kenny Rogers, when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em.

So, another year beckons. Stick with me, will you?

We Are Virginia Tech

I am an alumna of Virginia Tech. Class of ’82. When it came time to apply to college, I had no idea about safety schools or applying to a bunch… frankly, I had no clue about college admissions and I didn’t work the system. I applied to Tech, William & Mary and UVa. I was accepted at the first two and waitlisted at the third.

But I chose Tech because of the campus. The majority of the buildings are constructed of “Hokie Stone”, a gray-blue granite quarried locally. I was utterly smitten with Hokie Stone. On pretty days, the stone reflected the breathtaking blue of the mountain sky. On gray days, the stone embodied the resolute, iron-strong values of the university.

And I came to love the school’s Latin motto “Ut Prosim”, “That I might serve.”

I’ve been thinking a lot about Ut Prosim as the stories around the Blacksburg tragedy began to unfold. I was reminded of Ut Prosim as I heard the story of the Eagle Scout, shot through the upper thigh, bleeding from a wound to his femoral artery. This young man made a makeshift tourniquet and stopped the bleeding. Then, he moved around to his wounded and dying classmates, administering what first aid he could. Ut Prosim.

I thought Ut Prosim when I watched Tech President and alumni Charlie Steger conduct press briefing after press briefing, always clear, always calm, always thoughtful. I can only imagine what his presence meant to the students and parents he undoubtedly met with privately. His strong leadership and consistent commitment to openness and candor set the tone for the Virginia Tech emergency services team as well as the administration. Ut Prosim.

But nowhere was Ut Prosim more evident than in the heroism of Liviu Librescu, a 76 year old professor and Holocaust survivor who used his own body to block the door of his classroom to the shooter. I imagine Professor Librescu knew exactly the pain of losing dear ones to violence. I think he knew the sweetness of living life after having survived catastrophe. I can almost hear him urging his students out the window, “Go, go!”, urgency in his voice, as he gave his life so others would live. Ut Prosim.

Renowned poet Nikki Giovanni came to Virginia Tech in 1987, after I left. I recall seeing news about her appointment and being proud of my alma mater for inviting a poet of her reputation and stature to the community – a community better known for its engineering and architecture than its poetry.

In lyric remarks at the Convocation, Nikki Giovanni used the phrase “We are Virginia Tech” to punctuate her prose poem. It was inspiring. It was encompassing. It was what we needed to hear.

We are Virginia Tech. And now you are Virginia Tech. We are Ut Prosim. And you are Ut Prosim, too. Finding ways to serve – ways both big and small, heroic and humdrum – is incumbent upon all of us. It’s how we can honor those who have fallen, and begin to reach out to those in our community who need our help.

Poet Nikki Giovanni said it best:

"We are Virginia Tech.

The Hokie Nation embraces our own and reaches out with open heart and hands to those who offer their hearts and minds. We are strong, and brave, and innocent, and unafraid. We are better than we think and not quite what we want to be. We are alive to the imaginations and the possibilities. We will continue to invent the future through our blood and tears and through all our sadness.

We are the Hokies.

We will prevail.

We will prevail.

We will prevail.

We are Virginia Tech."